What the Hell is a Situationship… Bro?

A situationship is like ordering a cocktail and getting served emotional damage in a fancy glass.
You didn’t ask for it, but there it is sparkling with confusion and garnished with false hope.

Let’s break it down: a situationship is when two people are not dating, but also not just friends, and definitely not emotionally stable.
It’s like getting on a rollercoaster where no one tells you there are no seatbelts, and the operator left halfway through your second loop.
You’re just holding on for dear life, smiling through nausea, pretending this is “fun” while your heart quietly vomits.

You hang out, you talk, you maybe sleep together, and then… nothing. There are no labels and no accountability, just a weird purgatory where you’re not allowed to catch feelings, but also not allowed to catch flights with other people.

It’s “Let’s not define this,” until you see them post a thirst trap with someone else and suddenly you’re listening to Sufi music at 2am like your soul just got evicted.

Situationships are just IKEA relationships. There are no instructions, there are missing parts, and you’re left wondering why you’re crying on the floor holding a single emotional Allen key.

Bro, what are we even doing?

You’re investing time, effort, and your best memes, all while pretending you’re “chill.” You know what’s not chill?
Crying in the shower because your non-boyfriend didn’t text you back after sending “haha you are stupid” with a heart emoji.

You’re out here ghost-hunting your own dignity.

Let’s call it what it really is:
A budget relationship.
A bootleg romance.
A “try before you commit” subscription model, but without customer service or a refund policy.

And you can’t even be mad because technically they didn’t do anything.
They just didn’t do anything.

You’re stuck decoding messages like it’s Morse code:

“Hey you up?” = I’m bored.

“You mean a lot to me” = But not enough to date.

“Let’s see where this goes” = Nowhere, sweetie. It goes nowhere.

So, what the hell is a situationship, bro?
It’s emotional freelancing. It’s like trying to download love on a trial version of life.

If you’re in one, get out.
If you’re thinking about getting into one, get help.
And if you’re the one starting them… bro.. go sit in the corner and think about what you’ve done.

Until next time, amigos!